Every year, beginning January 2nd, our church holds a twenty-one day fast to pray for the direction of our church. Something about the event troubles me every year. We are told that fasting is important. Our pastor walks us through a list of “biblical” fasts. He connects fasting with special spiritual power. It is a chance to show God how much we love him. We are to feast on Christ and satisfy ourselves with God.
The message is clear, we should love God more than food. He waxes lyrically at how much he experiences, how rich the treasures he savors while he fasts. Fasting is the sign of a real spiritual athlete.
Every year, we have experienced some interruption and frustration as we have tried to join in the fast. Much of it had to do with the preparation requirements. Raw vegetables take far more time to prepare as compared to, say, throwing a steak on the grill. Unfortunately, given the pace of our live, we often didn’t have time to prepare a fast-compliant meal. I would also suggest that entering upon a 21 day fast after a month of holiday feasting is too drastic a shift. Indeed, New Year’s Day became a rush to consume leftovers before the fast commences.
To cope we programmed cheat days, which rather defeats the purpose of fasting, but perhaps a more honest admission that this is a step too far.
This year took our frustrations to a new level. My father fell just after Christmas and ended up in the hospital. Then my mother ended up in the hospital out of concern that she was having a stroke. Then my father fell again shortly after returning home from the hospital. This time they sent him to rehab after he was stabilized and from there he went to memory care. And then we caught COVID just after the first of year, from someone at church no less. Somehow eating only vegetables became singularly unappetizing. Chicken soup was the order of the day.
The evidence was unmistakable, I did not love God more than a large Zois’ Special without mushrooms. Christ did not satisfy and mostly what I experienced was growing anger and resentment at having to twist myself in knots in the hope of receiving a spiritual kick. As to what we should be doing in church, it was also clear that I am going to be busy with my parents for the foreseeable future. There will be no time for any additional ministry. When asked what I got from the fast, I kept silent, because what I got from it was that I really hate church.
Indeed, I found myself asking why we are doing this.
Certainly seeking God’s guidance for the coming year is important, but I’m not sure where the fasting comes in. Is it even necessary? Should we not start with reading His Word and see where that leads us? Or are we suggesting that somehow Scripture is somehow inadequate as a guide, or that unless accompanied by serious exertions, God won’t speak to us
But apparently we need something else, something even more than prayer. We need a bespoke “spiritual” experience.
I keep thinking of Elijah’s showdown with the prophets of Baal in 1 Kings 18:20-40. The prophets of Baal go through all sorts of conniptions in an effort to get Baal to act, without result. Jesus, too, suggests that endless repetition and manifest and manifold demonstrations of piety and zeal are misplaced. Does God need to see how zealous you are?
The Bible is pretty clear that fasting is part of a believer’s life, though it never explains why or when. Fasting is commanded for Yom Kippur, when God’s people were to reflect on their sins. A fast of sorts is called for Passover. The Jews of Susa fasted ahead of Esther’s meeting with the King to thwart Haman’s planned extermination of Persia’s Jews. Jesus teaches on fasting, but only insofar as explaining how to fast- namely don’t make it obvious. Jesus fasted for forty days after His baptism, presumably as a final preparation and purification before starting His public ministry. Thereafter he was known chiefly for enjoying food and drink. So why fast?
Traditionally, the Church has fasted on the calendar to remember the Passion and Christ’s sacrifice for our sins. The Church has also long recommended fasting as a personal discipline to curb the appetites of the flesh, or as a practice accompanying times of special, desperate prayer (Mark 9:29). But this program didn’t really fit any of those categories. It feels more like we are trying to bootstrap the usual post-New Year’s crash diet and dress it up in in Bible garb like kids in the Christmas pageant. We can find justification for what we want in Scripture without stopping to consider why the people in the Bible were doing what they were doing.
I found this linked article compelling. Fasting generally comes from a place of intense need, grief and pain. It comes at a time and place when you really don’t feel like eating because you are too worked up: “Fasting is a situationally birthed, psychosomatically sensed, prompt from the soul to seek direction, correction, or comfort from God through prayer-soaked abstention, as we await the return of our King.”
So, come January next, I will not be joining in the fast. I will enjoy a large Zois’ Special and invite you to join me. For where two or more are gathered together, there our Lord shall be.
Letters From a Far Country 